Substance Use and The Holidays
The holidays are a time when we come together, celebrate, and reflect on the past year. At the same time, the festivities of the holiday season can bring unique challenges and pressures, especially if you’re working on your substance-use health goals. With office parties, constant celebrations, and gifts that often involve alcohol or other substances, the season brings its own set of challenges. But if we treat the holiday season’s unique pressures as opportunities to build new coping strategies, we might find we can strengthen our resilience and reinforce our motivation to stay aligned with our substance-use health goals.
Why the holidays hit differently
The holidays can feel especially tough when you’re trying to make mindful substance-use health choices. Let’s start with the pressures that come with holiday gatherings. The expectations, etiquette, and culture of celebration often revolve around drinking, and it can feel relentless. Well-intentioned people may urge you to “just have one” or insist it’s part of the celebration. Those comments can make you feel uncomfortable or push you to explain choices you shouldn’t have to justify. These challenges can create a sense of pressure to set your goals aside in order to keep others happy.
The season can also bring mental and emotional challenges; financial strain, grief, stress, complicated family dynamics, and the pressure to create the “perfect” celebration can all intensify the temptation to fall back on old coping habits like drinking or using substances. Although breaking from your everyday structure may feel like a relief, the disruption in routine can negatively impact your capacity to stay grounded. Without the stability of a proper sleep schedule, support groups, or physical exercise, for example, you may feel more vulnerable to stress and cravings.
Facing the holidays without your old coping tool
I want to share an example from my own practice of how the holiday season can challenge you. As a therapist in private practice, I had been working with a client for about ten months. She was deeply committed to changing her relationship with alcohol, and it showed. From the way she communicated with friends and family to the boundaries she was setting at work; she was learning how to put her own needs first.
Then December 1st arrived.
She walked into my office looking distraught. When I asked what was coming up for her, she sat down, let out a long sigh and said, “I’m anxious, I’m having cravings, and it’s ruining a holiday I used to love.”
It was her first holiday season without alcohol. What had once been her go-to ally for getting through the hustle and bustle, the stress, and the overwhelm was suddenly gone.
Building a foundation of resilience
Laying the foundations of resilience helped my client, who was experiencing her first holidays without alcohol, get support when stress, cravings, and old patterns tried to throw her off balance. When the anxiety hit, the resilience she’d been building over the last many months helped her stay true to her goals. That foundation of resilience included things like staying connected to supportive resources, honoring her boundaries, and practicing compassion instead of self-criticism. Resilience softens the impact of tough moments.
The holidays are also a time when connection is essential. This could mean attending more support meetings, reaching out to online communities that offer special holiday check-ins, or letting your support network know you may need extra encouragement. It could also mean being honest with the people closest to you about what you need. If certain events or people threaten the goals you’ve created and aligned yourself with, practice saying “no”. Prioritizing your substance use health goals is an act of self-care.
Strategies that can help you get through the holidays
First and foremost, anticipate that there may be some challenges to navigate. This anticipation will help you plan ahead with practical tools to handle them. Here are some strategies that can help you stay aligned with your goals this holiday season:
- Plan ahead: We hear this all the time, but what does it really mean? It means thinking in advance about situations, conversations, or people that might trigger you to consume more than you want to. Prepare how you’ll say ‘no’ or decide ahead of time how you’ll step away from the situation if you need to.
- Bring your own drinks: Bringing your own sparkling water, craft soda, or non-alcoholic drink eliminates the awkwardness of choosing something once you arrive. It also gives you something to hold in your hand, which reduces how often people may offer you alcohol.
- Develop your one-liner: Having a brief, confident response ready can help shut down unwanted questions. A simple “I’m not drinking tonight” or “I’m taking a break” is enough. Practice saying it a few times so it feels natural.
- Reach out for support: Don’t wait until things feel overwhelming to reach out for support. Stay in touch with your support system or a trusted friend and let them know you might need a little extra support. Sending a simple text such as “having a rough moment” to someone in your trusted support network can be exactly what you need.
- Create new traditions: If your holidays are usually centered around drinking or substance use, consider using this time to create new intentions and traditions. For example, when you choose connection as your focus, your decisions naturally start to reflect that. Make space for meaningful memories that support the goals you’ve set.
- Give it time: When we first go without alcohol at social events or during times when we are used to having a drink, it is generally difficult. There is nothing wrong with you, and you are not failing if it feels really hard in the beginning. Changing any behavior is uncomfortable so recognize the discomfort as growing pains, knowing that it will get easier over time.
Take a step back and look at the bigger picture
Whether it’s your first or fifth time navigating your substance-use goals during the holidays, remember that the skills you build now will support you long after the decorations are put away. Every time you successfully move through a challenging situation, you build confidence in yourself and reaffirm the choices you’ve aligned with.
As you move through this season, keep your strategies within reach: anticipate and plan for difficult moments, reach out to your support system, and create new traditions that align with your goals. Each one of these steps adds up and reinforces the life you’re working toward. Be patient with yourself. Staying true to your goals means showing up for yourself consistently and making choices that reflect the life you want to build. Every moment you stay committed is a step toward long-term change and a more enjoyable holiday season!
ALAViDA Substance Use, a product of LifeSpeak Inc., is here to help you change your relationship with substances. The TRAiL is full of helpful tips ready for you to explore. Wherever you are on your journey, we offer a range of support options to help you make meaningful, positive changes. Access this link to explore further.
About the author:
Brianne is a Certified Canadian Addiction Counsellor, a Registered Professional Counsellor – Candidate, and a Certified Clinical Trauma Professional. She is a registered member of the Canadian Addiction Counsellor Certification Federation and the Canadian Professional Counselling Association. For over a decade, she has been committed to training and supporting individuals and families within the private and public sector. Brianne brings a unique, holistic approach to understanding and treating substance use behaviors.